Monday, June 16, 2008

terror in the 'burbs! or "drop and play dead"

Something besides "The Bruce" is Loose in Knoxville. A black bear is evading capture and roaming the backyards of West Knoxville. Dude has been raiding bird feeders for snacks and savagely dismembering small yappy dogs. That last part may have been a bit of an exaggeration, but it's how I like to imagine what I would do if I was a bear rampaging in the suburbs. Rest assured, I'm sure this morning many mommies did not let their lil' darlings out to tinkle on the lawn just in case.

Anyhoo, as of publishing time Mr. Bear has been making a mockery of police attempts of capture thanks to West Knoxville's low density zoning and lush overlandscaping. Having a virtual cornucopia of tree houses, barbecue porches, and golf bunkers to hide in, the bear may actually be safer from capture than it's ever been. However we know that here in downtown the bear would have been rapidly spotted and and killed by our equally rabid homeless population and that he would be grilling on a bonfire beneath the interstate interchange by now. This brings to mind one previously unanticipated benefit of our ring of superhighways:
Bear Fence

[Update] Mr. Bear has been caught.

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